2018 is done and dusted! Whew! I sure have mixed feelings about the just concluded…
My Passion – My husband and I sometimes play these online games of ‘how well do you know your spouse’ where you ask each other questions about yourselves. Eg I ask him what is my favourite colour, he asks me what is his favourite food.
The questions often get much deeper than that though, delving into childhood traumas, unfulfilled dreams, secret yearnings, personal fantasies, long-term visions etc.
It helps couples get really intimate with each other.
This particular day it was my turn and I asked him what am I most passionate about?
I was actually expecting him to say family or cooking or baking or writing or reading, but his answer threw me.
He said- God!
I looked at him, surprised. He asked what was wrong and I told him I was actually expecting him to say one of my hobbies. He laughed and told me “No. Your number one passion is God. You do everything for Him and with Him. Even your hobbies are all about Him. If He’s not involved, you don’t want it. If He tells you today to stop cooking, you will. You talk about Him the most and light up when talking about Him. He is your greatest love, your number 1 passion. You live for Him”.
I was stunned because it was an eye opener for me. Yes, I love God but hearing someone who knows me so much tell me plainly how obvious my love for God was made me see my relationship with God in a new light. It brought me joy and then shame. Why shame? Because I realized that with my husband, my parents, my siblings and close friends, people I’m comfortable with, I spoke freely and passionately about God but with other people, even on online chats and discussions, I reigned in this passion and tried not to talk so much about God so as to be ‘politically correct’. Not because I am ashamed of God, but because in a world that is increasing becoming hostile to God, I didn’t want to be seen as ‘forcing religion’ on people. True, we have a lot of obnoxious people these days masquerading as Christians in the most unchristlike way, and in my bid not to be like them, I was hiding Christ in me to the world. This was wrong! Very wrong!
I am called to be a light to the world. And as the bible so rightly says – no one lights a lamp and puts it under a bushel. And as a friend said – I refuse to let those offensive voices be the voice of Christ to the world.
I sat down and asked for forgiveness from my heavenly Father and now I daily receive His help to let my life, actions and words, be a reflection of who I believe. So the world can see and hear Him in me.
I am not a preacher, I am not a pastor. I am simply a woman who believes in and loves Jesus and wants to share Him with as many as will have Him.